Archive for September, 2008

I Conquered The Mountain

Posted in Blogroll, children, emotional, family, frustration, funny, growing up, healing, humor, KIDS, life, parenting, personal, random, thoughts, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 30, 2008 by Iron Mom

I think I am going to swallow my pride and post my dad’s favorite picture of me.  It does need a little explaining.  You see this is the day he tried to kill me, not literally.  I have been on this huge exercise kick and have lost tons of weight.  Well I kept telling the Wanderer how well I was doing, so he decided to test me this summer. 

                  

Every summer at the end of June the Wanderer’s brother and his family come into town and we go camping and fishing for 4 or 5 days.  This is me and Tooters favorite thing to do so we look forward to it all year long.  We go up as much as possible on our own, but usually only for a night or two.  Anyways the Wanderer said he was going to put me to the test during our trip.  Of course I got cocky and said, “Bring it on old man!”

 

Bad thing to say, very bad thing to say.  Unknown to me he had also been gearing up for this and hiking a rigorous trail several times a week so he was ready for me.  The first day we backpacked an hour and a half uphill to a little lake for some fishing.  I was a little winded because of the altitude but I made it ahead of him, and I was so proud of myself.  Of course Tooters ran most of the way and put all of us to shame lol. 

 

The next day came the big one.  We got into the jeep and drove for about 45 minutes to the trailhead.  Now we were here the last week of June so it was hot in town, around 100 degrees, but I was amazed that there was some pretty big snow drifts and this was just the start of the hike.  We made it up to the top of the pass after an hour and a half of uphill walking and it was gorgeous, well it was after I caught my breath.  I am amazed at what a difference in altitude does to ones breathing and heart rate.  I thought my chest was going to explode right there at the top of the trail. 

 

All of a sudden I hear the Wanderer and my uncle telling us to come on that we were not done.  I turned around and OMG there was the rest of the mountain ahead of us.  I swear I could hear it laughing at me.  Well I did not want to be the wimp so we started up.  Man was it steep and rocky.  Tooters and the Wonder Pup just kept running around and playing in the snow.  I felt like a 90 year old woman that needed an oxygen tank.  I am not kidding I could not breath and my heart was still threatening to explode out of my chest like an alien.  It finally got to the point I could only walk for a couple of minutes and had to stop.  Another 2 hours of hiking and we got to the top and dammit I could not even enjoy it for the first 20 minutes because I thought for sure I was dying.  The Wanderer just laughed at me and told me to “suck it up”, his favorite saying.  I found out later that the peak is 12,500 feet, no wonder I could not breath I live at 3000 feet where there is actually some air to fill my lungs.

 

After resting and eating a snack it dawned on me that now I had to go back down.  Now tell me how did he expect me to hike 3 ½ hours back down the steep mountain on legs of jelly.  I told him that I found my new home and just send supplies every once in a while.  With some coaxing from Tooters and more teasing from the Wanderer I got up and started back down.  When we got to the top of the first trail I told the Wanderer come hell or high water I was taking a break.  This is when he took this picture without me knowing in my moment of weakness.  As I lay there thinking how much I despised my father at that moment and maybe this was his revenge for my teen years I fell asleep.  I still to this day think he tried to kill me and I have the picture as proof. 

 

Obviously I made it back down and survived but let me tell you I will never brag about how I could out do the old man again.  At least not until next summer lol.

 

Just bury me now!!!!

Just bury me now!!!!

Meat or No Meat, That Is The Question Of The Day!

Posted in Blogroll, children, emotional, family, funny, growing up, healing, humor, KIDS, life, parenting, personal, random, thoughts, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 25, 2008 by Iron Mom

Before I get into my post I just want to say that I have nothing against vegetarians or choices that people make. 

 

OK with that said I have to pass on the newest development in our house.  This kind of goes along with my post from the other day, No Teens Allowed.  Yesterday morning Tooters and I were up getting ready for work/school when out of nowhere she decided to inform me that she is now vegetarian.  I stood in the bathroom looking at my beautiful daughter with my toothbrush hanging out of my mouth trying to wrap my head around what she just told me.  I mean she gave me no warning she just announced it and then kept getting ready for school like she had said something normal like, hows the weather.  So I rinsed my mouth and asked her to repeat it again. 

 

“Mommy I am now vegetarian can you help me pack a lunch because the school serves meat?”

 

First of all I don’t know where this came from because we love a good steak in this household and we eat a lot of chicken, fish and elk.  Don’t get me wrong I went through a stage in my life that I was vegetarian for a couple of years and I still do not eat a lot of meat but when I do I sure enjoy it.  Plus this is coming from the little girl that ate 6 chicken legs the other night. 

 

Well I did not laugh at her and I want to be supportive of her if this is what she wants to do so I went to the kitchen and we packed a fruit and veggie lunch.  She left the house very happy and proud of this new decision.  I left scratching my head.  I mulled this over all day wondering if she is being influenced from the older kids.  But then I thought that could not be it she went to school with those same kids last year and it did not phase her.  Oh well I just want to be a supportive mommy and I will talk to her about this more in the evening. 

 

That night I decided to test her and see how serious she is about cutting out meat so I did an awful thing, I took her to McDonalds.  First thing out of her mouth was, “Yea I want chicken nuggets and milk!”

 

So I told her that she cannot have that since it is meat.  Instead I ordered her a large fry and a couple of little cheeseburgers for myself.  We got home and I could see her watching me out of the corner of her eye and licking her lips.  I reminder her that she has her French fries and I can cook her some more veggies if she is still hungry but my burger is meat.  She was strong and did not say anything. 

 

About an hour later Tooters got very quiet and I thought she was outside playing with the dogs so I went to the kitchen for a drink and there she was.  Tooters was standing in front of the sink half way through my other burger and was inhaling it like she had not eaten for days.  I asked her what she was doing and this is the reply I got.  “I have decided that I am only vegetarian during the day and I can eat meat only at night, so that makes me a different kind of vegetarian.”

 

I did not argue with her I just let her finish up and then asked her if I grill a steak for dinner the next night is she going to eat it.  Of course she got all excited.  So I am thinking this is just a phase and I will just wait it out.  But she did get up this morning and have me fix her a fruit and veggie lunch again.  Anyone want to make a bet on how long this will last? LOL 

No Teens Allowed

Posted in Blogroll, emotional, family, frustration, funny, growing up, healing, humor, KIDS, life, parenting, personal, random, thoughts, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 23, 2008 by Iron Mom

Holy hell I have a teenager living in my house in the form of a 6 year old.  This just cannot be, please not yet.  I have always said that I do not want a teenager in the house and Tooters will be put up for auction on ebay at 12 and a half.  Of course when I mentioned this to my brother he said he would buy her and give her back.  Then I would really be stuck with her since it is rude to return to sender. 

 

She is not acting out or talking back like a bratty teen but it is some of the things that are coming out of her mouth lately.  Take a couple of weeks ago for example; Tooters came racing through the house like she had a fire under her butt.  She had the widest eyes, her hands on her heart and breathing heavy saying, “Mom you will never believe what I just saw on t.v.”

 

Now in my mind I am thinking a new toy came out that she just has to have or she will die.  Maybe the new Barbie movie was released, who knows.  So I asked her what was the huge deal was and wait for it, wait for it, here it comes…… The Jonas Brothers were going to be on the VMA’s on MTV.  Who the heck are these boys? I have never heard of them, but obviously Tooters has because I thought she was going to pass out from the lack of air.   Are six year olds really supposed to get this excited over some boy band?

 

Then there was today.  I pick Tooters up from school everyday and I just happen to have to run some errands for work.  This put us on Main Street headed for the post office.  Of course I am on a really big Pink kick right now and in love with her last CD, I cannot wait for the new one that is getting ready to come out.  Anyways I hear this voice from the backseat asking me to, “Blast it mom!  Blast it mom!  Can we go get a pop?”

 

Does this not sound just a little like a teen or am I just freaking out?  Really there are more things that she has started doing and saying that frightens me because they are just so far beyond her little years.  Please do not take my baby yet let me have her for a while longer?  So from me to you Jonas Brothers, damn you and your boyish looks and little screaming fans!!!!!!!!!

 

Is It Finally My Time??

Posted in Blogroll, emotional, family, frustration, healing, humor, KIDS, life, parenting, personal, random, thoughts, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 22, 2008 by Iron Mom

Here is the deal, I left The Donor five years ago this coming January and so far I have not had the urge to date.  I have focused on trying to climb out of debt that he put me into, (anyone have extra money on hand for a poor single mom, now accepting donations) and most importantly my daughter.  So really it has not been a big deal.  Don’t get me wrong I still like to look at a cute guy but if it anything more than that I get nervous.  Why would I want to jump back into that fire?  My marriage was not the best and left a bad taste in my mouth and trust issues on the side.  I have been asked out a few times but I always find an excuse not to.  Really I should not do that, I don’t want to project my issues with men onto Tooters, but then again I have grown accustom to my lifestyle and it suites us right now. 

 

Now here is the glitch in the whole thing, I am starting to get a spark of interest in the idea of just casual dating.  I got very sick this winter and packed on the pounds and since February 1st I have managed to shed 54 pounds.  I think I look tons better, feel great, and I like the

attention I have been getting recently.  So here is my dilemma, I don’t know how to meet guys anymore.  I have been off the market for almost ten years.  Plus I live in a tiny town that I grew up in so I know almost everyone here and that makes it even harder to date. 

 

But there is a light at the end of the tunnel…..I hope.   My best friend that is like a sister to me has a pre-school here in town and she told me about a single dad that has started coming in a couple times a week just to volunteer and bring his daughter with him.  My friend did not have any more room in the program so this is his way of getting his daughter in at least a couple days a week.  OMG if I was to start dating I think this is the kind of guy I would be interested in.  So I kind of felt like I was back in school again the other day by giving my friend the mission to find out more for me and see what she could do to introduce us. 

 

This is an ideal guy to date.  He would be patient about kids things, accepting and understanding about breaking plans for little tummy aches or because there is no baby-sitter available.  Plus his daughter is 4 just 2 years younger than Tooters.  Wow I hope this works.  I was starting to wonder if I really was meant to just sit back and watch all the other happy couples in the world pass me by.  Either that or I really am destined to be the crazy old cat lady on the corner with no cats.  I am getting there, I am getting older and I live on the corner LOL.   Holy hell I think I am starting to heal finally.  WOOO HOOOO FOR ME!!!!

I Are Smart!!!!

Posted in anger, Blogroll, emotional, family, frustration, healing, humor, KIDS, life, parenting, personal, pets, random, thoughts, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , on September 17, 2008 by Iron Mom

Ok I have just seen the funniest thing in a long time.  Not only did I laugh until I cried I realized what kind of education system there is in my tiny town. 

 

Here is what happened:  I was downtown driving on Main Street and normally I do not pay attention to the signs that the motels have posted.  I mean I live here I don’t care what special rate they have going for the weekends.  There is one in town that has a restaurant attached to it that advertises meal specials for the weekend.  Well there was something about this sign that made me take a second look.  So I turned around and OMG there it was the funniest sign I have seen in ages.  I even pulled over so I could get out and take a picture.  There it is in all its glory was the Pancake House boasting for everyone to come and try their special. 

 

XXX PORN CHOPS

THE JUICIEST BEST ONES IN TOWN!  COME IN AND ENJOY YOURSELF!!!!!!

 

Just as I am getting ready to take a picture for proof I hear some women behind me saying how awful that is someone should do something about that terrible sign.  So naturally the curious person that I am I turned around to throw out my own comment and there I stood face to face with a bunch of nuns in full habit.  Holy hell I thought I would die laughing right there on the side of Main Street.  They just shook their heads at me and kept walking. 

 

After I calmed down and wiped my eyes, I did do the right thing and went in to let the clerk know what they were advertising.  I only did this because I know quite a few of the people working there and one of them is a manager.  I would hate for her to get into trouble for something like that. 

 

So if you are ever in Podunk Utah please stop in for a juicy porn chop.

Mommy Mommy Mommy

Posted in Blogroll, emotional, family, humor, KIDS, life, personal, random, thoughts, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 16, 2008 by Iron Mom

First off I want to apologize to the few people that actually read my blog.  I had an entry up that I included a short story that I wrote.  It was a very powerful and emotional story that was very very close to my heart.  Anyways I had to take it down because I have entered it into a few contests and I am trying to get it published along with a few of my other short stories.  One of the magazines I am submitting to asks that the story not be published at the time of submission including blogs.  So if I can ever get someone to buy it I will re-post it.

 

So now onto today’s post.  I think that the above title says it all.  It does not matter what I am doing or whom I am talking to, Tooters chooses that moment to follow me everywhere close enough to step on my heels.  (I am a compulsive pacer when I am on the phone).  I work for the government so that means that I work A LOT and take phone calls at home in the evening sometimes.  Tooter chooses this time to be loud, repeat mommy mommy over and over again or just plain do what she wants and not listen to me.  This is a new behavior and only started recently. Please do not get me wrong she is such a good girl but she has figured out (I swear there was help from one of her friends) that when I am on the phone with my boss she can get away with murder until I am off the phone. 

 

Well the other night was especially busy because there is on going extra paperwork and stuff regarding the very large forest fire in my area recently.  Part of my job deals with wildfires, pretty cool huh!!  So while we are deep in our conversation about bureaucratic bull crap paperwork Tooters is pulling on me with the usual questions and complaints, “I’m hungry. I am bored.  Can I have some candy?  Can I go play next door? Can I keep bugging you until you want to rip your ear off?”  Well you get the hint.  Finally I put my boss on hold and I told Tooters that if she did not let me deal with work for 15 peaceful minutes I would call the cable company and cancel Disney.  OMG did that start a tantrum.  You would have thought I was abusing the poor child instead of just threatening to cancel the channel with Hannah Montana.  I told her that if she did not calm down and go watch cartoons right now she would spend everyday after school in her room until Christmas.   That did the trick and off she went sniffing with every step.

 

Please understand I rarely ever talk like that to her but I swear it was one thing after another that day.   First the dog puked in the living room, I locked myself out of the house and to top it all off I had a flat tire.  I did not realize it until I got to the gas station for gas.  So I pulled off to the side and started to change the tire and here is where it got really bad.   There was some jackass that was watching me from his semi, he got out and came over to me.  Here I am thanking God that someone was going to help me and instead he stands there eating his breakfast telling me that I am not doing it right.  One of the things my dad made sure I know how to do in life is change a tire so I know I was doing it right.  Finally I looked up at him and told him he should try doing this with torn tendons in his shoulder (that is a whole different post all to itself) and if he was not going to help he could go right back to his truck.  I think this pissed him off but I did not care at the time.  I eventually could not take the pain and called for help. 

 

It seemed like it just got worse from there so you can imagine what kind of mood I was in when I got home that night.  With that being told this brings me back to Tooters.  While she was in the other room I could hear the cartoons going and decided she took my threats serious and was letting me finish up with work.  After another 30 minutes I got off of the phone and headed for the living room to thank Tooters for being a good girl.  I walked into the room and there she was and there was the room.  I hear something scream and I realized it was me; Tooters just sat there with an “Oh shit” look on her face. 

 

That precious child had destroyed the living room by bringing every toy she owns in with her and scattered them on the floor.  At the end of the couch she built a tent for the Wonder Pup and had blocked her inside in a time out for knocking over her Lego’s.  To top it all off she was coloring with my highlighters that I use to keep track of where I am at on my cross-stitch patterns.  She had colored a few pictures and had scribbled them down to a nub. 

 

After that I just needed some me time so I did not even make her clean up at that moment I told her just to get ready for bed and go to sleep.  She must have known that I was very upset and tired because she was in bed in record time even though it was only 7:30.  I ended up cleaning most of the mess up myself before sitting down for a minute.  This is one of those days that is especially challenging being an only parent.  I mean if there were someone else there at least the mess would have been avoided.  I sometimes get angry for being alone at times like this but then I take a breathe and think I am ok and I would not trade my life for anything.  Besides that will teach me to ignore the “mommy mommy mommy” pleading from a restless six years old.