Archive for fall

Lost Marbles, Found Marbles

Posted in angels, anger, Blogroll, children, cleansing, clothes, cute kid questions, cuteness, dog, early morning, emergency, emotional, entertainment, fall, family, friends, frustration, fun, funny, funny picture, funny things kids do, giving, growing up, healing, health, help, hope, humor, KIDS, life, mom, parenting, personal, personality, random, seasons, sick, single mom, thoughts, Uncategorized, winter, work with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 12, 2009 by Iron Mom

Today for some reason is just a frustrating day and I think I will tell a little story to lighten things around here.  This story is based on actual events, however no finger pointing will be done and the identity of the main kid will remain secret.  It will not be revealed because I am afraid of retaliation and great bodily harm lol.

 

Once upon a time there lived a brother and sister.  They were close in age and loved each other dearly even though the mother could not tell by all the fighting done during the day.  At the end of the day brother and sister were put into the bathtub together (they were still young enough to do this) to peal off several layers of dirt, grim and who knows what else.  There was extra scrubbing involved this night because of a muddy project in the backyard and the mother wanted to make sure she had brought the right kids into the house. 

 

Brother and sister had heard the term digging to China and wanted to test the theory.  They found the perfect spot in the middle of the yard, in the garden and with the help of the neighbor kids started digging.  Since it was fall and most of the garden was picked the mother watched this going on thinking,

 

 “Oh God please let them dig till they are exhausted and go to bed early tonight!”

 

Well after a couple hours and a few feet later they found out that the further down they went the more mud they found.  The mother sprang off of the porch to start pulling kids out of the hole that was several feet down before they got stuck for good.  See she did not think they would get as far as they did, but she was sadly mistaken.  The kids had dug far enough down that they were getting into a water table that part of the town sits on.  After some crying and fussing all the dirt was returned to the hole, China would have to wait for another day I guess.  Neighbor kids were sent home to their parents, brother and sister were sent to the tub. 

 

Now this is where everything got interesting and I know the mother could feel the hairs on her head going not gray but white.  The little bit of sanity that she was holding onto for the night disappeared.  What happened was not bad but it was another one of those funny kid moments that you do not dare laugh in front of them, but you just cannot help yourself.  So here we go.

 

Once it was revealed that the proper kids were in fact in the bathtub the mother rinsed them off and decided to get sister out first.  Out came the little girl and the mother set about getting her dried off and started combing out the ten feet of rats nests sitting on top of her head.  The whole time the little boy is still playing with his toys in the tub.  Just when the mother was almost done there was a blood curdling scream coming from the bathroom.  The fear was evident in the mother’s face and you could see the thoughts in her head racing through.  The little girl was quickly moved aside and the mother went from the hallway outside the bathroom to standing next to the tub in a fraction of a second. 

 

Now with all the squealing coming from the little boy you would have thought there was blood everywhere or there were missing limbs.  Instantly the little boy realized mother was standing there and he looked up with all the alligator tears on his cheeks and started freaking out.  He kept repeating over and over again,

 

“I swear mommy I didn’t do it!  I swear I did not put anything in my mouth I don’t know how they got into my body!  I promise I did not do it! WWAAAAHHHH!!!”

 

The mother for the life of her could not figure out what was going on and finally got the boy to calm down enough he could tell her what was going on.  Now when I tell you what he said just close your eyes and try to image all of this in your head.  Are you ready?  OK here it is straight out of the boy’s mouth while he is looking straight down the whole time.

 

“Mommy I swear I do not know how the marbles got in my body.  I am a big boy, I don’t put things in my mouth anymore and I don’t remember swallowing my marbles.  So I don’t know how they got there!”

 

The mother perched on her knees next to the tub staring at the little boy still not quite comprehending what he was telling her asked him if he can feel the marbles and can he point to where they are at. 

 

The little boy took a deep breath, calmly looked at his mother and point to his……… “area”.  Instantly it dawned on the mother he found his “beans” and being a toddler thought that he swallowed some marbles and they got stuck there.

 

Without a word she calmly stood up walked out of the bathroom, yelled for the boy’s father and told him he was needed in the bathroom right away.  Honestly I don’t know what happened to the mother the rest of the night she simply walked away shaking her head, giggling, and saying,

 

 “What next?”

 

So that is my story for the day, I will leave the speculation of the boy’s identity to you.  Those of you that read my story that knows who I am in the real world and you do not quite know who it is just think really hard and you will figure it out.  As for the little boy, I am soooooo sorry and please don’t hurt me lol. 

 

Have a great day everyone!!!!!!!!!

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Seasons According To The Wonder Pup

Posted in Blogroll, children, clothes, costumes, cuteness, dog, emotional, fall, family, friends, fun, funny, funny picture, humor, KIDS, life, parenting, personal, personality, pets, pictures, puggle, random, seasons, thoughts, Uncategorized, winter with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 5, 2008 by Iron Mom

OMG winter is almost here if it isn’t already.  I went to bed last night and it was freezing cold with a few snow flurries out my window.  It was actually a beautiful site.  I even left the blinds pulled up a little bit in my bedroom so I could watch until I fell asleep which means summer is definitely gone for good. 

 

But this is not how seasons are determined in my house; a little Wonder Pup decides them.  Here is how it goes.  It starts getting colder in the morning so that means that I jump up out of bed and turn on the heater before the alarm clock rings for the third time.  Tooters and I love the snooze button.  While it is warming up Tooters, the Wonder Pup, and myself huddle under the covers waking up.  After this is done I have to force the dog out of the bed just to go outside to potty.  This is the first indication the seasons are turning because normally she will race me to the door.  My next indication is after she comes in to eat breakfast while Tooters and I get ready for the day, she hides in her crate under her blanky.  Now I have to bribe her to come out so I can put her outside while I am at work. 

 

Don’t worry it is not like I send her out in the elements to freeze.  She has another large dog crate in the backyard covered with an old piece of heavy carpet to keep the wind out and some fleece piled up inside to keep her warm.  Besides when it gets to cold I leave her inside in her bed until it warms up during the day sometimes she prefers to stay there all day.  I know this because for such a little dog she has tons of muscles.  She will dig her little feet in and refuse to move no matter how much I pull on her. 

 

Well last night a storm moved into the area, it is still kind of cold and cloudy today.  I ran home on my lunch break to let her out for a potty break and she refused yet again to go outside when I offered it.  So I finally broke down and brought out one of her shirts.  Holy crap on a cracker she was so excited you would have thought I was offering up a steak lol. 

 

Now don’t laugh at me.  Sure she is spoiled but she only has clothes for the cold seasons, I felt sorry for her sitting around and shivering all the time.  This is what I mean by the seasons according to my dog.  She is now wearing her lightweight fall shirt.  As it gets colder the heavier her sweaters get.  Please don’t judge, but she even has a going out walking/visiting fancy sweater.  Does this mean I am finally morphing into that crazy lady on the corner that treats the pets like kids?  I know winter is fully here when she starts wearing her lightweight shirt to bed at night. 

 

So now you know according to the Wonder Pup it is officially late fall in southern Utah.  I even took a picture of her while I was home today for lunch to show you how cute she really is in her shirt.  The Wonder Pup always struts around after I dress her to show everyone how adorable she is all dressed up.  Boy did I get the blue light special on personality with this one, you can even see it in her face.

Aren't I pretty?

Aren't I pretty?