Archive for work

What Did I Just Get Myself Into?!?!?!?!

Posted in Blogroll, children, clothes, co-workers, college, cute kid questions, cuteness, early morning, emotional, fall, family, friends, frustration, fun, funny, funny picture, funny things kids do, giving, goals, growing up, help, hope, horror, humor, job, KIDS, life, mom, parenting, personal, personality, pictures, random, resolutions, school, seasons, single mom, thoughts, Uncategorized, work with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 18, 2009 by Iron Mom

You know it has taken me 3 months to get here but I made it, I am officially now a college student. I am scared because I am 30 something and been out of school for so long. Luckily I am going to school online this semester and taking only two classes but I am still a little intimidated, I mean I have to learn to study and take tests all over again.

I have to admit I did take 3 classes a few years ago and did not do my best. I started out with hard classes thinking “No problem I am a smart adult, I will fly thru this thing!” OMG I was wrong. Let me just make a suggestion to everyone out there interested in college. It is not impossible for anyone, even single parents like myself, but examine what is going on around you and make sure it is a good time. I tried to do it when I had a 3 year old running around, was working full time one place, part time at another place, going through a nasty divorce, adjusting to being single again, and trying to travel in between. That is a recipe for disaster. So I am trying it again and as of today I am fully admitted, I even received all of my Pell Grant money. Wooo hooo for me!!!

Tooters is now 7 years old so I think she can handle all of it better this time. I set her down the other night and I explained to her that mommy was going back to school so I would need her help so I can pass with good grades. She looked at me and asked if I flunked something that I had to make up. I gently told her how this is good for us and will help me in my job. Then I heard my words come flying out of her mouth:

“Well you know you cannot play with your friends, the computer or anything until your homework is done. That means right after work mom, that is what you said the rule is!”

OMG what a little momma she is turning into. Even the other day riding our bikes home she made sure I was on the sidewalk behind her because it made her feel safer that I was not so close to the traffic. Crap that is what I tell her all the time. The other night I was on the phone and she overheard me cussing about something so she came into the room and reminded me that the words I was using are unacceptable and I need to remember proper manners. Holy hell I thought when I was a mommy living on my own there would be no more censorship. Well she sure showed me I guess.

I thought I would brag a little bit that I am a full fledge college student. I am stoked and so starting in May if I don’t blog as much you know where I am, hiding with my nose in a text book lol.

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Special Ed Strikes Again

Posted in boss, co-workers, cuteness, early morning, emotional, entertainment, fire, friends, frustration, fun, funny, funny picture, healing, help, hope, humor, job, life, personal, personality, politics, random, thoughts, work with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 15, 2009 by Iron Mom

Ok readers it is time for a silly boss story to be posted.  I have previously posted a story (Missing: One Brain Cell Possibly More) about my boss and promised more so I decided to make good on it today.  All stories about my boss are true I swear.  So here it goes. 

 

This is the time of year that we start looking at budgets for the fire center operation costs for the upcoming summer.  It is always a little stressful to try and break it down and come up with a number that will satisfy everyone involved.  Keep in mind this was last year and after what happened I am not sure he will want my opinion this year lol. 

 

My boss (Special Ed) came into my office and sat down to go over it with me.  He likes to do this and get my input since I am over there and I know what is going on.  Well we got right to it and started going down the list.  It is pretty standard stuff like supplies, training materials, and day-to-day things.  Then he gets towards the bottom of the page and gets this very perplexed look on his face.  I sit there watching his face contort in confusion waiting for him to tell me what is on the page.  Finally he speaks up and asks me what this certain charge is for and why it is so much, this is how the conversation went:

 

SE: “What is a face smile and why am I paying $300 for it?”

 

Me: “A what?!?! Can you repeat that again?”

 

SE: “A face smile, a face smile, what the hell is a face smile??”

 

Me: “OMG are you serious? Did you just say what I think you said?”

 

SE: “Yes a face smile, what is that, I am being serious?  Can you please explain this to me?”

 

At this point all I can do is stare at him not really believing my ears, my brain actually starts to hurt trying to process this information.  Then here comes the laughter.  At first it is just a little giggle then as I think about what was just said I start laughing harder and harder.  The secretary across the hall actually came and checked on me because I was laughing so loud and so hard.  I just could not help myself and I think at one point I peed a little.  This was the type of fit that your stomach cramps up, there are tears running down your cheeks, and you start making the retarded faces because no noise is coming out just a little gasping sounds as you are trying to inhale before you pass out. 

 

Poor Special Ed is just sitting there asking me to explain to him what is so funny.  I finally calmed down enough to tell him what is so funny.  He was looking at the charge for the FACSIMILE’S!!!!!!!  As soon as I said it I started laughing again, this really just struck me as hilarious.  Special Ed at that point reminded me who signs my timesheets and that my yearly evaluation was coming up.  He jokingly told me that I am replaceable.

 

Now for some reason these are the times when my brain misfires or something and comments fly out of my mouth before I can stop it.  I don’t know why and usually I regret it as soon as I am done speaking and I have regained control of my mouth, but not this time.  What I said next was perfect for the moment and has become a legend in the office.  This is what flew out:

 

“Can you confirm that with a face smile?”

 

At this point one of my co-workers in the next office that was listening to the whole thing exploded with laughter with me.  Special Ed at this point just hung his head with defeat and shuffled up the hallway disappearing for a while.  He did eventually come back.  When he did he peaked around the corner and asked if I was done laughing at him so he could come back to work. 

 

We still joke about it in the office from time to time and laugh all over again.  God I love my boss some days, he definitely keeps things very interesting for me.  So next time you are around a fax machine just remember according to Special Ed it is a face smile lol.  

Missing: One Brain Cell Possibly More

Posted in anger, Blogroll, boss, children, cleansing, co-workers, emergency, emotional, family, friends, frustration, fun, funny, healing, health, help, horror, humor, life, personal, personality, random, sick, thoughts, work with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 28, 2008 by Iron Mom

I usually try to leave work stuff out of my blog but my boss did something yesterday that I just have to talk about.  Now I know he tries really hard but there is something about this guy that is way off.  Some days are worse than others.  His heart is in the right place I just don’t know that it is communicating with his brain. 

 

I was sitting at my desk hard at work as usual **wink wink ** when my boss and one of the other guys in the office walked in to get something out of the supply closet across from me.  Well they were standing in the doorway talking about general work stuff when my boss trying to make a point stomped his foot on the ground a couple of times.  Just as he did this the other guys cell phone made a doorbell noise, this just could not have been better timing.  The boss looked up shocked and I swear to God he asked me if he made that sound when he was stomping the ground. 

 

I don’t know what came over me but at that moment I just could not help myself, I very seriously looked at the boss and asked, “What noise?? I did not hear anything.”

 

He just looked from me then to the other guy looking very confused.  I asked the other guy if he heard anything thing then I asked the boss if he was feeling ok.  What happened next was classic.  He started stomping his foot on the ground like a horse saying watch I will make it do it again.  How I kept a straight face I will never know.  The other guy was turning purple because he was working so hard to keep from laughing.  I thought this guy was going to blow an O-ring or something. 

 

So of course I asked the boss if he was sure he was ok and did he remember to take his medicine that morning.  All he can do is keep stomping and saying just a second I swear I did it.  He finally gave up and mumbled something under his breath and shuffled back to his office.  As soon as I was in the clear I raced up the hallway to the closest exit so I could go outside and laugh.  I still have not told him that it was the cell phone and not his foot!

 

You know this is not the first time he has done something this absurd.  I wonder if he has lost a few marbles here and there.  Anyways it doesn’t matter to me what is wrong with him as long as he continues to brighten my day like that sometimes. 

Looking For Good Opinions

Posted in Blogroll, children, cleansing, emergency, emotional, family, fire, friends, frustration, fun, funny, growing up, healing, health, help, humor, KIDS, life, mom, parenting, personal, quit smoking, random, sick, thoughts, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 23, 2008 by Iron Mom

Before you read this post please keep in mind that I am running on no sleep and no food.  I am trying to decide right now if I should keep trying to do the Master Cleanse right now.  There is a large fire in my town that I have to help work so this means insane hours.  Let me give you a rundown of the last few days and you will see what I mean. 

Monday I was in bed with the stomach flu and ate very little, I went to bed that night and had a hard time sleeping so I got maybe 6 hours of sleep if I am lucky.  I finally gave up at 4:45 am and got up for the day.  I worked a full 10 hour shift then picked up Tooters went home and went for a walk then did some laundry.  Then all of the fires happened and I got called into work and was at the dispatch center by 2am.  I was released from there at 8:30 only to go to my office and continue to work until 1pm.  Keep in mind that I still have not slept. 

Then I had to go to the pharmacy and I spent 30 minutes standing in line.  I did something there that I have never done before.  I fell asleep standing up like a damn horse.  Who knew I had such talents?  I finally made it home and tried to sleep.  By 6pm I gave up trying to sleep through the dog barking and me freezing on the couch.  I was too lazy to get up and turn up the heat.  So I went to get Tooters from my friend’s house.

I called work and sure enough they needed me in by 10pm.  I took Tooters to my dad’s house and got her settled in so that I could go and get ready for work myself.  So here I am sitting at work and I think I have only had about 8 hours sleep since Monday, I think. 

Today is going to be even worse.  I will get out of dispatch at 6am only to go get Tooters and get her ready for school.  I will take her back to the office with me until time for school and shuttle her there.  I will continue across town to go to physical therapy for my shoulder.  Now instead of going home and going to bed I have to go back to work because I have some pressing paperwork that has to be done today.  Then I have to be at the specialist at 3pm to find out if I have to have tests done this afternoon or schedule surgery.  After that I still do not get to go home and go to bed I have to go to a Parent Council meeting to finalize the plans for our booth we put together for the festival this weekend.  Still no bed in sight for me because I have to take Tooters to my dad’s house then go get ready for work and be back here by 8pm. 

So my thoughts are with all of this there is no way my body is going to properly benefit from the cleanse at this point and maybe I should give up just for the day and restart tomorrow.  This will be easier because my dad is off work and can take Tooters so that I can sleep and I am not trying to split my time between two offices. 

The more I think about it the more I like this idea.  Then again I am onto day 3 and I have to waste all of the progress just to start over again.  Who knows maybe I am just rambling because I am sleepy and I cannot take a nap.  I will put a poll at the bottom please chime in and let me know your thoughts.

 

Icky Boys and Their Icky Noises

Posted in anger, Blogroll, children, construction, emotional, family, frustration, funny, growing up, healing, humor, KIDS, life, parenting, personal, pets, quit smoking, random, thoughts, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 8, 2008 by Iron Mom

I am putting a question out there and hopefully I get some kind of an answer.  What the hell is up with you men and your noises???  Here I sit in my office and there are guys putting in a new duct system in the ceiling and OMG it sounds like either a porn studio has moved in or someone really needs a laxative!!!!

 

I am on day 2 of not smoking and thankfully I have not ripped anyone’s head off yet, but let me tell you I am getting closer.  I started off my day coming in an hour early so that I can let the workers into my office.  But wouldn’t you know it they were over an hour late! In my mind there goes head number one for the day. 

 

Then they come in and first thing they do is turn on the air conditioner so that they are comfortable working all day.  It is a whopping 46 degrees outside, turn the freaking a/c off!!!!  The whole time I am sitting at my desk wrapped up in Tooters pink princess fleece blanket.  I look like a pink Eskimo that ran away from Disneyland, not the look I was really going for today.   There goes head number two.

 

They finally get to work and the banging, the drills, and God only knows what other tools they are using to make all that noise is enough to make you go deaf.  Every time they move around in the ceiling I inhale a little more dust and fiberglass insulation, at this point smoking sounds safer to me.  There goes head number three.

 

To top it all off the two guys that are working, going up and down the ladder are making noises that I just should not be hearing unless I am married to it.  I do not even date so noises like this should stay at their home and not invade my peaceful office.  Let me enlighten you.  First there was the grunting.  I thought maybe one of them got stuck so I stood at the bottom of the ladder and called up to see if they were ok.  Of course the one grunting is just fine and just laughed at me.  Head number four.  Tomorrow I am bringing him a Dulcolax and leaving it on top of the ladder as a hint. 

 

About an hour later both are working on the same duct and all I hear is this ear piercing whistling, if he was whistling a tune only the dogs knew what it was.  Then the porn noises start.  “Ugh ugh ugh, oh yea right there now push it push it.  OMG right there stop don’t move, oh yea!”  Now if you were sitting in my seat listening to these kinds of things your mind would wander too.  Admit it, it sounds dirty huh?  I am so sick of hearing this I could scream and for that there goes heads five and six. 

 

To top it all off everyone in the office, except for me, has laptops and have chosen to work from home.  Then I find out that the two-day job has just turned into 2 weeks.  God help me through this without to much carnage.  How am I to stay sane and calm listening to this?  So this brings me back to my original question, must men make such nasty noises when they work?  Is it a macho thing, or does it really help tighten that screw just a little bit more?  Heck just for the fun of it there goes head number seven, it’s a lucky number, I just do not know for who right now.

One More Bad Habit Up In Smoke

Posted in anger, Blogroll, children, emotional, family, frustration, funny, growing up, healing, humor, KIDS, life, parenting, personal, random, thoughts, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 7, 2008 by Iron Mom

In my house every once in a while I wonder who is really in control, Tooters or me.  I tried to quit smoking back in January, which obviously did not work out for me so I have been thinking in the last week that I need to try it again.  During the day I do pretty well one maybe two until bedtime comes.  This has been my nighttime routine for 13 years now, lock up the house, bathroom, smoke and jump into bed.  If it is a bad night then I will get up and smoke then go back to bed.  Since I am an insomniac this is ok, my body is used to very little sleep. 

 

I keep telling myself that at the end of this pack I will quit.  Well last night that choice was taken away from me.  I do not ever smoke in front or around Tooters so after she was in bed asleep I went out the side door for my nighttime smoke.  While I was sitting there thinking that this tastes gross tonight, I heard the most pitiful crying coming from inside.  Quickly I put out my smoke and ran into the house hoping Tooters was not vomiting again.  She had the stomach flu last night and I don’t know that I could take another night of changing bed sheets from projectile vomiting and wondering what the hell she ate to make it day-glo orange. 

 

When I was racing through the door I almost knocked her down because she was standing in the middle of the floor in front of the door crying.  I swept her up and took her to the rocking chair and asked her what was wrong.  It took a few minutes but she finally calmed down enough to tell me what was making her cry.

 

“You’re going to die and leave me!!!!!” and with that the tears started to flow again. 

 

I just looked at her trying to figure out what she was talking about and I asked her to repeat that and explain it to me.  After a few more minutes of heart wrenching sobs she explained to me that my lungs were turning black and they are going to shrivel up like raisins.  She also told me no one can breathe with raisins in their chest so I had to quit smoking right now. 

 

That clinched it for me.  I put her back in bed found my old box of patches, put one on, and threw out the last couple of cigarettes that I had.  So here I sit this morning a very tense bundle of nerves and very irritable.  My boss sat here this morning talking to me and for some reason it was like listening to nails on a chalkboard, I mean I could just picture myself knocking him out of his chair.  This is bad because usually I am so easy going.  I was going to save my patches for just at night but I am thinking now I might need to pick up some more for daytime.  I would hate for the headlines tomorrow to read, “Employee Decapitates Boss For Cigarette”

 

So wish me luck everyone on quitting.  I also want to apologize to my friends and family in advance for any comments or fits that might occur in the next few days.  I promise to keep the claws and fangs under control as much as possible. 

Mommy Mommy Mommy

Posted in Blogroll, emotional, family, humor, KIDS, life, personal, random, thoughts, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 16, 2008 by Iron Mom

First off I want to apologize to the few people that actually read my blog.  I had an entry up that I included a short story that I wrote.  It was a very powerful and emotional story that was very very close to my heart.  Anyways I had to take it down because I have entered it into a few contests and I am trying to get it published along with a few of my other short stories.  One of the magazines I am submitting to asks that the story not be published at the time of submission including blogs.  So if I can ever get someone to buy it I will re-post it.

 

So now onto today’s post.  I think that the above title says it all.  It does not matter what I am doing or whom I am talking to, Tooters chooses that moment to follow me everywhere close enough to step on my heels.  (I am a compulsive pacer when I am on the phone).  I work for the government so that means that I work A LOT and take phone calls at home in the evening sometimes.  Tooter chooses this time to be loud, repeat mommy mommy over and over again or just plain do what she wants and not listen to me.  This is a new behavior and only started recently. Please do not get me wrong she is such a good girl but she has figured out (I swear there was help from one of her friends) that when I am on the phone with my boss she can get away with murder until I am off the phone. 

 

Well the other night was especially busy because there is on going extra paperwork and stuff regarding the very large forest fire in my area recently.  Part of my job deals with wildfires, pretty cool huh!!  So while we are deep in our conversation about bureaucratic bull crap paperwork Tooters is pulling on me with the usual questions and complaints, “I’m hungry. I am bored.  Can I have some candy?  Can I go play next door? Can I keep bugging you until you want to rip your ear off?”  Well you get the hint.  Finally I put my boss on hold and I told Tooters that if she did not let me deal with work for 15 peaceful minutes I would call the cable company and cancel Disney.  OMG did that start a tantrum.  You would have thought I was abusing the poor child instead of just threatening to cancel the channel with Hannah Montana.  I told her that if she did not calm down and go watch cartoons right now she would spend everyday after school in her room until Christmas.   That did the trick and off she went sniffing with every step.

 

Please understand I rarely ever talk like that to her but I swear it was one thing after another that day.   First the dog puked in the living room, I locked myself out of the house and to top it all off I had a flat tire.  I did not realize it until I got to the gas station for gas.  So I pulled off to the side and started to change the tire and here is where it got really bad.   There was some jackass that was watching me from his semi, he got out and came over to me.  Here I am thanking God that someone was going to help me and instead he stands there eating his breakfast telling me that I am not doing it right.  One of the things my dad made sure I know how to do in life is change a tire so I know I was doing it right.  Finally I looked up at him and told him he should try doing this with torn tendons in his shoulder (that is a whole different post all to itself) and if he was not going to help he could go right back to his truck.  I think this pissed him off but I did not care at the time.  I eventually could not take the pain and called for help. 

 

It seemed like it just got worse from there so you can imagine what kind of mood I was in when I got home that night.  With that being told this brings me back to Tooters.  While she was in the other room I could hear the cartoons going and decided she took my threats serious and was letting me finish up with work.  After another 30 minutes I got off of the phone and headed for the living room to thank Tooters for being a good girl.  I walked into the room and there she was and there was the room.  I hear something scream and I realized it was me; Tooters just sat there with an “Oh shit” look on her face. 

 

That precious child had destroyed the living room by bringing every toy she owns in with her and scattered them on the floor.  At the end of the couch she built a tent for the Wonder Pup and had blocked her inside in a time out for knocking over her Lego’s.  To top it all off she was coloring with my highlighters that I use to keep track of where I am at on my cross-stitch patterns.  She had colored a few pictures and had scribbled them down to a nub. 

 

After that I just needed some me time so I did not even make her clean up at that moment I told her just to get ready for bed and go to sleep.  She must have known that I was very upset and tired because she was in bed in record time even though it was only 7:30.  I ended up cleaning most of the mess up myself before sitting down for a minute.  This is one of those days that is especially challenging being an only parent.  I mean if there were someone else there at least the mess would have been avoided.  I sometimes get angry for being alone at times like this but then I take a breathe and think I am ok and I would not trade my life for anything.  Besides that will teach me to ignore the “mommy mommy mommy” pleading from a restless six years old.